When the Sista drives you to self abuse

Fuck sake. I mean....fuck sake.

I don't want you to get the wrong idea - I can fully understand that anyone married to our Home Secretary would need to crack one out manually but there are ways of doing it without getting caught. Plus I love the idea that her feminist tendencies has driven him to taking himself in hand and objectifying vulnerable women in order to get some satisfaction.

If you are going to get the state to pay for having a wank then the least you can do is use the internet connection to download some good old fashioned yank girls taking it up the tradesman or maybe some romantic dogging pictures. What you don't do is buy them on the itemised Virgin bill.

Also what has not been covered in the MSM (thank god for blogs eh?) is that Virgin pay-per-view grumble is really fucking dire. The fact that he was so desperate to feel like a man that he turned to total crap softcore porn should humiliate Ms Smith. Her harpy tendencies has forced her husband into the most degrading position - wanking in the house to some of the most untitilating movies ever produced. The Ann Summers catalog is better.

PS: As I have said over at LabourList just there there was a campain to send each MP a copy of 1984 a couple of months ago. It came with a note saying "this is not an instruction manual" and had the concept of state-provided pornography. Obvisouly he got the copy of the book but the wife did not pass on the warning note.